Day 4, controlled (whatever!) crying.

Last night Isabelle decided to mix it up a bit and woke at 4.30 am, which Ive decided is an improvement. She didn’t scream, just whined loudly, so I foolishly thought she might give up and drift back off to sleep. Fat chance. After an hour I decided to try giving her a shush, which woke her up, completely. Excellent. So as I lay awake, Isabelle screamed, and screamed and screamed. And then, after half an hour of going in after 5, then 6, then 7, then 8 minutes, she whimpered. I saw my chance and shushed her off to sleep, which this time worked, (oh the inconsistencies of sleep training!).

I’m too old for all this. A friend encouraged me to hang in there today, it took just over a week for it to work with her kiddies. A WEEK? I’m not sure I can survive for a whole week. The hardest bit, apart from the crushing exhaustion of course, is the doubt that sets in in the middle of the night, when there seems to be no end in sight. Is it working? How long until it works? Will she ever go to sleep? Etc etc etc. Tonight I’m going to use earplugs, I won’t ignore screaming, which I’ll hear, but I will ignore whimpers as I think she needs to learn to get herself back off to sleep. But then what do I know, I’m making it up as I go along.

If you’re awake in the middle of the night, then think of me and all the other mothers out there awake. We can do it, we really can! *gently whimpers and collapses in the corner.*

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