Can I have my boobs back please?

I started breastfeeding on the 6th of September 2006 and I’m still doing it. That’s almost seven years! My poor old boobs, they really could do with some time off for good behavior, they’ve “done us proud”, as someone might say if they were from the East End and very pleased with my breast’s achievements. But you know what? I think I’m done. It’s time to pack away the now grey and frayed nursing bras, and bring out the new pretty push-ups! Oh but I can’t, can I, because Isabelle is obsessed with breastfeeding.

Our word for it is dudu, which apparently is what they call milk in some parts of India. My dad was born in Burma and that’s what he used to call milk when he was little, it was therefore what we called milk when I was little and has now stuck for us. Unfortunately Izzy has also stuck, stuck to my knockers! Whenever she wants some she lies prostrate across my lap and squeaks, “dudu, dudu” just in case I’m not sure what she wants.

I thought when I went away to Sheffield for a few days, (with Mum for her op) that she might simply forget about the joys of dudu. Fat chance! For the first few hours of my return she didn’t ask for any, but then it was like she suddenly remembered what she’d been missing and demanded some right there and then. To be fair, I’m now only breastfeeding her three times a day (that’s still quite a lot isn’t it?) which is less than previously, but really I’d like to have stopped completely by the time she’s two.

The question is, how do I stop? With my other two I stopped breastfeeding at 14 and 19 months and it just sort of seemed quite natural. But with Izzy, I just can’t see an end. If I try to deny her she FREAKS OUT and not mildly, oh no. She SCREAMS and SCRATCHES and HITS and ROLLS ABOUT (too many caps?). We’ve tried formula with which we’ve had limited success but at the end of the day she just likes the real deal.

Really though, who can blame her? As the youngest of 3 kids she has to fight for my attention all the time, so I guess it’s her way of having me all to herself. I can’t really say I hate it either, she’s so cuddly and sweet and she is my last baby. I just hope she’s ready to give up before she starts school…

Any time, any place, any where. Literally.


2 thoughts on “Can I have my boobs back please?

  1. I didn’t feed quite as long as you (16 & 17 months), but I dropped one feed at a time with a month in between. Felt kinder and more natural to both of us. I think I kept on feeding Henry because I knew I wouldn’t be doing it again and didn’t really want it to end, but like you really wanted my body back after 5 years of pregnancy & breastfeeding.

    I won’t lie, he was a shocker when I stopped. He had a few months of terrible behaviour which I am sure was a direct result. But I wanted to stop and I was happy that he didn’t need the milk anymore. We sometimes forget to include ourselves as a factor in the decision and only think of them. As mothers we automatically think of the effect on the child and don’t even think about what is best for us too. Izzy will be fine, even if takes her a little while to move on. And you will too.

    • Good advice Mel, you’re right! As a fundamentally lazy mother however I’ll always take the easy option which currently is just giving in! I think the problem is I don’t know where to start, it feels like those three feeds are essential to her. But maybe I’ll drop the daytime feed as a start. Xxx

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